msyl

2009-12-28T01:33:00.000-08:00

leaving for narita via los angeles for 8days and i will miss you.

2009-12-26T09:26:00.000-08:00

26th december was a great mistake made.

2009-07-15T17:27:00.001-07:00

kelvin's wedding.. so blissful! go see the photographs.. so sweeet

http://www.zenithstills.com/kelvinkarenportraits/

http://www.zenithstills.com/kelvinkarenportraits/

2009-06-25T08:18:00.000-07:00

and so my leave ends this friday.. so freaking emo... i hate to work.. but what can i do about it.. life is just like this.

i have dreams.. big dreams.. i wanna open my own shop.. live in an apartment with my own swimming pool.. so i can get my girl friends to have pool parties with me.. i want that fancy lifestyle which those rich peeps are living at sentosa cove.. i dont mind leaving along white house park.. or even berrima road..

i recalled that very day when i was working as a poor poor designer.. my boss brought me to view this home.. which is like....... so damnnnnn nice.. in the car porch.. awaits that freaking yellow lambo n that beauty maserati... freaking hell... n his gf is ah tiong lor... do u noe whats ah tiong? make a guess... hahaha i just learnt this term frm my bf...

after visiting that super duper home... i told myself i wanna be rich.. n i wanna be successful and i wanna live a super good life.. i dont know if i can do it.. but i really dream of it everyday... hahahah.... maybe my plan of opening my own food stall will be a good idea.. :P

huitze is gonna quit her job n study in sydney.. im going to miss her.. cos she's really a super crazy friend.. im really happy that she managed to change her narita-lax flight to my frankfrut-nyc flight!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so im gonna have 8 good days with her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! here we come nyc!

2009-06-23T11:02:00.000-07:00

2009-06-10T19:11:00.000-07:00

i guess im gonna stay with my current job for another 2 years? i fucking hate it so much, but i think thats the safest thing to do now..

ABU DHABI = HEATSTROKE

2009-06-08T05:07:00.001-07:00

2009-06-06T01:58:00.000-07:00

the pain in my head is not going away... fuck

aileen, you made my day, flying is so horrible.. being in the country with a group of ridiculous people which u rarely know for a few hours.. having to go eat with them.. ice break with them.. hang out with them just for the sake of going to the nearby mall for meals.. fucking sucks.

2009-06-04T08:42:00.000-07:00

in abu dhabi now... cant wait for aileen to come.. :P

hello singapore!

2009-05-27T15:27:00.001-07:00

im finally back home to this freaking hot island. hahaha.. but im so happy to be home. guess what, i was freaking sick in frankfrut. i had a mad mad allergic reaction which happened in a split second.. just like that! i was in Prada and i tested the latest perfume.. and within minutes.. i swell like a watermelon.. and i couldnt breathe... f.shit you know...

was admitted to the hospital.. given a drip and a couple of jabs.. can you imagine.. i had to go through OVERSEAS DOCTORS AND NURSES AND NEEDLES without my loved ones by my side.. i was crying like a baby before the injections were given to me.

i still cannot believe how i managed to overcome the fear of being all by myself in another part of the world, another timezone, facing the greatest fear i have in life.
im just so so happy that im able to come back home.

anyways... here are some pictures of my sightseeings in new york! (that was before i went back to frankfrut when all the nightmare had started)

MINDFARK

2009-05-19T01:09:00.001-07:00

IM LEAVING FOR A 8DAYS FLIGHT TOMORROW... SLAP ME.. I DONT WANNA LEAVE HOME............

omggggggggggggg

2009-05-16T03:06:00.000-07:00

im feeling freaking emotional now. u know why... im leaving for flight in a few hours time.. sighs..

one freaking year has passed

2009-05-07T01:39:00.000-07:00

and im still dreading to start that shit make up and hairdo with the uniform to work. sucks like shit shit SHITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

for example, today i gotta be at airport at the evening, i will not step out of my home from the moment i wake up till the moment i have to start preparing for work... so freaking emo u know.. haha i sound like some psycho kid... but its seriously horrible... i hate putting on that clown-like smile.. smiling from one end to the other.. or sometimes i will give that god damn sarcastic smile by showing my teeth.. wahahha!!! WTF!!!!! and when i smile like that.. just try doing it.. its like showing the dentist ur teeth... mr. dentist asks you to smileeee......... GRIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and den i will start laughing to myself for being such a cb fake person. i hate it.. but what can i do about it... i chose this path... i like the money... so i only can tell myself everytime before i start to leave home... its the money im up for.. nothing else...

my darling.. Anna

2009-04-12T09:46:00.000-07:00

Anna; this girl is my veryveryvery good girlfriend i knew in poly. We laugh like mad siao kia together and she's the one who always sees me cry like a loser/crybaby whenever i have a fight with my bf... haha. She's one lovely girl that accepts my imperfections, craziness, er xin-ness. In fact, we do alot of crazy things together.. we laugh at the slightest thing, we can make not-funny jokes to funny jokes... talk in alien... spoil language... i remember in poly days.. everything we said and end our sentence is with the word spoil.. food spoil... hand spoil... hair rot... etc...

I love you Anna! i'm so happy after these few years, we still can talk like nothing has changed..

You have been going through a big roller coaster ride for the past months.. it was hard for u to go through, but im sure u will get over it very soon. You deserve so much more, so much more better... I know you will find someone really good that would give u his best in time to come.

Hang in there! Jia yuo! you have me.. you have your gfs... we are all here for u !

fun!

2009-04-12T09:34:00.000-07:00

it was a fun night with eirene,linn and new found friends! surprisingly linn n i could get along very well with eirene's gfs! we had sooo much fun doing rubbish in the room and just enjoying that girls night out!

2009-03-17T06:45:00.000-07:00

i need to look for something outside this fly world.

2009-02-12T23:18:00.000-08:00

lunch with ping at ding tai fung.. she's going back next wed.. gonna miss her.. i will miss her laughter and that smile on her sunny face. :(

when 2009 says hello

2009-02-12T02:14:00.001-08:00

just seconds, over a night, things turn ugly. when i thought family bonds gets better, over an issue, we ain't talking well all over again. i have to blame myself, yes myself for all these... sighs

whheeee! paradise

2009-01-20T16:21:00.000-08:00

2008-12-17T09:38:00.000-08:00

keeping my fingers crossed real hard that my flight will be approved for swop of off days!!!! i just wanna be with my baby.... :(

2008-12-15T08:53:00.000-08:00

jalan bersah dim sum with my brother. its rare that he would actually leave home for food late in the night.... hmmmmm. 12.54am tuesday morning. damn it. im starting work on thursday. its going to be a mad mad rush as i have taken up an extra flight which falls on xmas eve n xmas itself. it was suppose to be my off days as i will be back from manchester on the 23rd. however i decided: CHIONG AR. i need to work extremely hard. please bless me with good health and fighting spirit that i can go through this with a positive mindset.

7.17am

2008-12-14T15:16:00.000-08:00

i was almost in the state of depression when i knew i couldnt spend the weekend with my boyfriend. whining with that sulky shit face almost the whoooole friday....saturday. but i was damn bloody happy to recieve the call from him on sunday morning around 2am that he could book out!!!!!!!!!!!!! woke up at 5 to get sausage muffin w/egg n headed to his camp!

now im back home... feeling all so lonely again

time flies...

2008-12-13T09:48:00.000-08:00

2008-12-12T11:15:00.003-08:00

sighsssssssssssss i miss my boyfriend so bloody much. driving out by myself, i feel so insecure...
please come back home to me soon baby...

2008-12-10T09:17:00.001-08:00

met up with wp,mar,mich,hy my sec sch mates!

dinner @haji lane

2008-11-17T10:34:00.000-08:00

2008-11-16T20:15:00.000-08:00

off days in Nov 21, 22, 26

Dec 7, 8, 9, 10-17(leaveeeeeeee), 23, 24, 29

athens, greece

2008-11-15T07:19:00.000-08:00

im back home sweet home. my 7days athens was veryvery good. people around me were fun and nice. how lucky. if only all long trips have nice people...

2008-11-07T17:35:00.001-08:00

picture this, i have been a bloody piece of shit the past 8days.

sleep-eat on bed-food under bed-sleep-wake up-use the same bowl that was under my bed-eat-sleep-leave home-out out out doing nothing but.. eat? supper.. talk shit-home
sleep-eat on bed-food under bed-sleep-wake up-use the same bowl that was under my bed-eat-sleep-leave home-out out out doing nothing but.. eat? supper.. talk shit-home
sleep-eat on bed-food under bed-sleep-wake up-use the same bowl that was under my bed-eat-sleep-leave home-out out out doing nothing but.. eat? supper.. talk shit-home

and now i have to go back to that life.. smiling so wide like a big fat liar.. oh well.. i cant complain. that's my job huh.. bloody hell.. when i think of having to leave for a 6days trip.. i just feel sick.. but on the brighter side.. im heading to Athens.. always wanted to see the Acropolis.. so i guess i should be more positive. im such a loser huh? i have the chance to visit all these wonderful countries.. and yet im here complaining... i should learn to like my job soon.. its been bloody 10months.. i hope i will.

2008-11-04T18:51:00.000-08:00

annual leave from 01nov-08nov!
nov off days 16, 17, 18, 26.. actually thats all.. haha

with my hairband girl (tee-hee-hee)

2008-10-23T10:06:00.000-07:00

2008-10-22T07:48:00.000-07:00

im on annual leave now. so bloody happy!!!!!! here are some photos of my last trip!

2008-09-17T22:43:00.000-07:00

was having supper with a friend of mine last night. we were discussing whats life all about. we are living in the world where money really is necessary to our life, where we gotta face it... saving for future needs.... be it studies, passion, travel or just the things you wanna do, the places you wanna go. i cant seem to answer this you see... working in this line, yes, earning a well amount of money that I can save monthly, and not having to be a stingy little shit details.

was watching PS I love you for the 3rd time and it just cant make me not cry. Its the saddest thing when you just cant let go of that someone you have always thought, would be there for you, would be the one who you can count on, being that partner who would live up to your promises and giving you the big huggs and kisses everyday you get back home from work, and he just leaves you w/o giving you time to prepare yourself mentally that, "Love, i gotta leave you.."

2008-09-17T01:48:00.000-07:00

on joyjoy's 21st!

2008-09-16T10:01:00.000-07:00

looking thru my folders of pictures with my friends, here are some of my favs:

i miss you my dear friends.

2008-09-16T03:27:00.000-07:00

hey there im back. met very very very nice people again. this time, for once, work was so enjoyable for me though i was still having a little bad gastric pains. its really the leaders that sets the mood. I seriously seriously have to say, this is my F-I-R-S-T time after five god damn months that I felt so happy working. working hard for for the right reason and with the best people. ive got no pictures to post. im really not the typical ones that are super enthusiastic, going around snapping the food i eat, the places ive walked around.... sometimes sometimes, i do snap pictures.

i guess its because its my bloody third time there. how nice okay, im always doing these routes. nice roster. so nice. (rants rants rants like no tomorrow.....)

anyways, im going to meet CQ soon. i need to make bloody full use of all my time i have in sg. for friends, family. this makes me alive. so alive! woohoo!

leavedatesssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-09-13T18:41:00.001-07:00

oh well, after much shit hard of work, here are my given leave dates:

18oct-25oct 8days
01nov-07nov 7days
11dec-17dec 7days

i just cant wait for these days to come... i will rot and meet up with my friends! so bloody happy i cant waittttttttttt

2008-09-13T05:46:00.001-07:00

actually i wanted to talk more about last nights meet up with my fellow friends. however i was having very bad gastric pain till it was just that sentence. ha. now i have taken a big terrifying cup of ginger water that mum made for me, and though it suck, im feeling alot better. i can fart now, n my tummy isnt cramping that badly than the few hours ago.

so here it goes, i need to complain first, ive been called up for a freaking MELBOURNE again. how nice. its my 3rd time going there. on the happier side, i can see my coussie there. :)

last night's chatting session was good. it made me think about what i should be doing in time to come, how i should plan for my future, how am i going to make my life/career something that i would be comfortable and contented with.

i found an old picture, here it is, it really does make me smile..

2008-09-13T04:24:00.000-07:00

poly mates & kk over supper at kovan yesterday.

2008-09-09T20:15:00.000-07:00

accompanied CQ for her night classes at SIM. makes me think what if i wanna study in time to come. doing my full time job and on the other hand, having to go diligently for classes. guess who i bumped into? NICHOLAS! unlucky. anyway, as mentioned in my previous post, I reported sick for my money tree flight. there goes my income this month...... my heart is aching!

leaving tonight, be back home on friday at 5.45pm... i know time will fly darnnn fast.. i will be home real soon. polymates+lecturer= YEPPIE!

2008-09-07T20:19:00.000-07:00

wahahahhaa i reported sick today! there goes 1.4k..... good bye new york

2008-09-06T17:48:00.000-07:00

leaving on monday for 8days, will be back the 15th. wish me luck.

2008-08-25T10:25:00.000-07:00

lotsa catchin up with anna over dinner. its been sometime since i ever talked about anything and everything. i am so happy that we are still in touch. ive been missing out all the laughters with friends, genuine friends.

2008-08-25T01:56:00.000-07:00

next friday is my big day!!! its gonna determine if i can offically drive on the roads of singapura!!!!!!!!!!!

Heidelberg, Germany lovely!

2008-08-23T10:14:00.000-07:00

i have thing for fluffy clouds..

candy clouds..

2008-08-18T08:11:00.001-07:00

i remembered those days when i wished so badly to get this job, being able to travel and be happy. today i went back to the place where it all started; training school. those days i was so determined to jump up from bed, get dressed and all ready to start this dream. now, i look back, and really wonder what the fck have i done. its not that job i pictured, getting all excited for my departures and arrivals. now, let me describe this feeling to u, soaking ur hands in ice cubes for 5 mins and den trying to pinch them.... this is how it feels

and for a moment, we were happily holding hands skippin around and now ure gone. i miss you...

2008-08-17T09:05:00.000-07:00

im praying fcking damn hard for a good roster.. please please, ive been doing my work well, award me with offdays on weekends, i NEED them badly......*trembles shivers gitters*

helllllllloooooo

2008-08-16T08:03:00.000-07:00

im back home from johannesburg.. south africa. HA. weather was cold.. blah blah blah...and im just so glad to be home!

waraku again!
flying over the mountains..
nua-ing..
platter for 1 at Ocean's Basket!
diana - im so glad to have her in this flight!

2008-08-11T19:31:00.000-07:00

i met very nice people in shanghai! :)

2008-08-05T09:16:00.000-07:00

aug is a happyhappy month for me. most touch downs on fridays and offdays on sats n suns. unlike jul when i that solid month i was unable to meet my baby. i'll pray damnnnn hard for sep to be happyhappy month for me too.

please please, grant me touch downs on fridays and offdays on sats sun. i have been very very hardworking.

2008-08-04T08:37:00.000-07:00

2008-08-01T18:55:00.000-07:00

weekends are here!!! its been a month since i get to spend my weekends in town.
Waraku pasta is a must try! *yummy

2008-08-01T01:36:00.000-07:00

im back home, back to this cosy home where my heart always belongs.

2008-07-17T02:14:00.000-07:00

when it was this day i burst into tears. unbearable.

2008-07-15T23:28:00.000-07:00

2008-07-15T18:57:00.000-07:00

too good to be true.

2008-07-15T00:11:00.000-07:00

if this was life's daily dosage..

2008-07-14T18:20:00.001-07:00

jepun chocs & buddy = : )

2008-07-09T08:07:00.000-07:00

2008-07-08T19:21:00.000-07:00

life is good when you have loved ones around...

2008-06-22T22:30:00.000-07:00

im leaving for a long 8days flight. i'll be home soon. wish me luck mannnnn

2008-06-22T09:19:00.001-07:00

the money that can't buy love.

jk

2008-06-18T09:13:00.000-07:00

2008-06-16T01:20:00.000-07:00

when you dont know if this is meant to be or just being too reliant on your other half.

hey world

2008-06-11T11:44:00.001-07:00

I am beginning to understand how my job works.
I can do this. I CAN DO THIS! GO MEL GO!

argggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

2008-06-07T22:03:00.000-07:00

when one plays mind games with u for 17hrs.. it makes you go bonkerss!!! im back from my 8day trip. so damn tired... wasn't bothered or looking forward to whip out my cam to snap some photos but here's one:

quite pointless anyway.

2008-05-29T01:51:00.000-07:00

misss u

2008-05-23T05:12:00.000-07:00

looking at the videos of my baby. i miss him so much... : (

home sweet home

2008-05-14T09:09:00.001-07:00

I spent my days in Milan eating pasta/pizza almost everday. the ladies were nice! happy!

feels so good to be home.. however im just missing out my boyfriend.. he's gone to taiwan for 3weeks but he plesantly left behind a present for me...

Thank you del, you're the sweetest : )

Chedi Milan

2008-05-10T01:41:00.000-07:00

this is the only thing i look forward to once work is done!

2008-05-05T04:34:00.000-07:00

leaving for flight tonight.. i'm feeling soooo sick. when im back, del is gonna have off days till he leaves for taiwan on monday evening. it sucks when i cant send him off. i will have to do a 6days flight on fri. i feel so bad. i am going to miss him so badly. i don wanna face wednesday.. wednesday, thursday and half a day of fri.. thats all i have with him.. till he returns on the 1st of june.. i'm a *^%# shit!!!!!!!!!

bdays

2008-05-04T23:24:00.000-07:00

felicia pang
apple tan
cynthia on cq's 20th bday (i still have not met baby Brayden! cant wait!)
bday girl
jia's 21st

12:12am

2008-04-23T09:21:00.000-07:00

My very first time being alone in a hotel room. I fear loneliness. When I first arrived Manchester, checked in my room, I broke into tears, I couldn't believe this was happening. I doubt one would understand this feeling; Loneliness. Started to think of all the people closest to me... I couldn't help but kept crying. I didn't know who to turn to. I resorted to texting my mum, telling her how lonely i felt.

This job is really all about being independent. Never once I have faced my greatest fear. In a way, it makes me stronger to face the truth of having to overcome my fear. I wanted this job so badly, and what I did? To cry. My handphone was my next best friend. I started reading all the text messages my family and friends that I have kept. This is so emotional... but I guess, this is just the beginning of my career, a newbie in this profession. Being alone won't be uncomfortable to me soon. I have to overcome this. I have no choice.

Right now, I am missing my boyfriend so badly. I wish I had not chosen this job. But again, its my dream. Sometimes, I don't understand myself. On one hand, I wanna fufill my dream, one the other, I can't get used to the lifestyle of this job. I need to talk to someone. Can you imagine, each time I see my boyfriend I go to him with tears? I don't think that is very healthy. I only get to see him twice a week or sometimes even once. Cry to him, because I can't bear to see him go. I need him. I need him.... I need him to tell me that he will be there for me.. But there again, if I have not chosen this job......i cant complete this sentence

I wish to share this with my mum, but she has much more things to worry about. Friends, I would love to, but I don't know what is holding me back. I can't believe I'm typing while crying. I feel lost. I feel so lonely. I feel so so lonely. Probably after a few months I will be more positive. I have to let go the feeling of being homesick, my fear and my loved ones. I wish I have someone to lean on to dry my tears. Oh my god. I'm not trying to make myself feel horrible, but this feeling sucks. I only can blame myself for not being strong enough for this job.

Soon, I have to learn to be independent.

Manchester, England

2008-04-22T19:13:00.001-07:00

I'm back! Manchester was good. Good because I went shopping and caught a soccer match. A very good once in a lifetime experience. The stadium was filled with all the emoooo people. Screaming and cheering for their hometeam. The match was against Portsmouth. I finally understand why guys go addicted to soccer. It is such a different feeling when you watch it on TV and life at the stadium. I will definitely go catch another match if its possible! Here comes the pictures...

The picture below are taken by a Canon SLR. Look how clear it is!

Can you see my colleague in white running up towards me?

good-bye training days

2008-04-17T05:36:00.001-07:00

18 apr-22apr Manchester
25 apr Chennai
28 apr Perth
02 may Saigon
03 may Kulau Lumpur
05 may-07may Osaka
09 may-14may Milan / Barcelona
17 may-19may Melbourne
21 may-23may Shanghai

Sunday

2008-04-12T23:26:00.000-07:00

I'm officially gonna start this career on the 18 April 08, Friday (FOR REAL)

Do not know if I can make this last.
Weekends clashes with his. Please tell me that I can do this well.

when weekends come n go

2008-03-30T08:50:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, i wonder if i can make this dream succeed.

= (

2008-03-25T06:39:00.000-07:00

i layered my hair today... im so depressed! just for the bun...

i have to learn to live without my thick hair.

backkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

2008-03-17T20:44:00.000-07:00

hello!

sydney, did not get to shop as i was deaddddddddddddddddd tired HOWEVER i was still being DRAGGED to go sightseeing.

and narita, too many things to look at! here you go!

snysnysnysnysny

2008-03-10T05:39:00.000-07:00

its dooms day tomorrow. reporting at 10.30pm.
please make this work.

cny 08!

2008-02-10T06:48:00.000-08:00

hoooray!

2007-12-01T04:07:00.000-08:00

I made it! Yes, yes, yeeees! Gonna say a loud good-bye to my current shitty working place.
Thanks to the Virgo males. They suck big time.
Anyway, Korea with mummy early November. Pictures!

hello worlddddd

2007-11-24T07:22:00.000-08:00

trust me, i'm not good at updating.
i'm back blogworld!